Sledding

Jonah wanted to invite his girlfriend, Mykenzie, sledding.  Toby invited his buddy Ollie to come along.  Jonah, Mykenzie, Toby, Ollie, Sheri, Jeff (Mykenzie's dad), and I all had a great time!

Christmas Eve service: Jonah's solo

Jonah sang a solo and read on Christmas Eve at church.

Merry Christmas!

To all our friends and family:

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! 

Adventures in Drama

Last week, I volunteered to help with Footlights!, Toby's school drama club, as they built sets and set the stage for Friday's production of "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer."



 While the actors rehearsed their lines, the backstage crew kids cut out snowflakes, created posters, designed sets, and decorated trees.  There was cutting, painting, glueing, brainstorming, and the ideas flowed freely!

 











I was amazed by the creativity, teamwork, and ownership this group of kids displayed!  The energy level and controlled chaos was a bit overwhelming at times and once again, made me feel such gratitude for the professionals who work with these kids each and every day.

This experience reminded me of my high school set crew days (we did not have a drama club in elementary school) and was so much fun!

The leadership, direction, support, and encouragement from the Footlights! leaders was inspiring! They possess a vision for the production perfectly balanced against the grace to let the kids develop their own ideas.





Toby has defined himself as "a backstage guy" and cried when they tried to cast him as a reindeer.

Ms. Nora DID coax him up onto the stage (he's behind the newsboard in the middle):

 The production was wonderful and all the cast and crew members put on a great play!!

Rudolph cast and crew

The Few . . . The Proud . . .

no wait; that's the Marines. . . wrong slogan. . . another organization entirely

This evening, Jonah joined Boy Scouts.  His buddy John has been trying to talk him into joining for years.  The time was never right - Jonah was interested but not enough to sign up.

Then this past weekend, John invited Jonah to a Boy Scout Base Camp Extravaganza...

They had a blast!

Robotics

Climbing gear. . .

Jonah climbing

Jonah came home determined to become a Boy Scout, so tonight he went to the troop meeting and got himself registered.

So much of Scouts is right up Jonah's alley: 9 camping trips per year, service projects, badges for hiking, biking, swimming, etc.  We know he is going to love it!

Ken and I are trying hard to overlook our reservations: not liking the social-political stances (Sheri), worried about the time commitment (Ken) . . .  and just let Jonah enjoy this new venture. 

Thanksgiving Essay by Toby

transcription of "Thanksgiving essay" by Toby  11-20-12:

     My life is very good. I am very thankful for everything, but mostly my life, my family, and getting an education.  what more could I want?

     I am very thankful for my life. I am thankful for the beutey to see. The fresh air to breath.  The games to play.  The food to eat.  Most of all, the water to drink.

     I am very thankful for my family.  I am thankful for my mom, to take care of me.  My dad to take care of me when my mom isn't home.  My brother to entertain me.  My cats to comfort me.  My dog to play with me.

     I am very thankful for getting an education.  I am thankful for getting a better job.  For getting a higher chance of going to colledge.  For greater knowlege.  For better skills in reading, writing, math, ect.

     The paragraphs above tell you about three things I am thankful for.  But I am thankful for many more things in the world.  These are what I am most thankful for in the world.

Pepper's New Trick

Perhaps you can't teach an old dog new tricks, but being a young dog (and smart), Pepper is very trainable.

Here is Pepper's newest trick:

The Amendment: View from our Peeps

Tomorrow is election day.  In Minnesota, unless one is completely tuned out, you know that we will decide on a proposed constitutional amendment: which would insert language into the Minnesota state constitution defining marriage as between a man and a woman.

About a month ago, our church hosted a workshop put on by Minnesotans United for All Families clarifying what this amendment is and is not, and encouraging all of us to have conversations with people we know regarding this upcoming vote. 

The boys had been aware of this issue for some time; however, this event brought up additional conversation.

That day, in the car, Toby asked, "So people want to make it illegal for two moms or two dads to get married?" 

We explained that same sex marriage is already not recognized by the state of Minnesota and that this amendment would put that into the state constitution.  Voting no on this amendment does not make same sex marriage legal.  This was perhaps most confusing of all.  "Wait - what?! It's not legal in Minnesota to marry your partner if you're gay? Then why have this amendment?"

They said, "So, gay people can have kids, right? . . . but they can't get MARRIED?"  This makes no sense to them.  Why would the state of Minnesota want to prevent someone from marrying the person that he/she loves?  good question.

We explained as best we could the arguments on the pro-amendment side. (I admit we have a little trouble trying to explain the pro-amendment argument that the Bible defines marriage = one man + one woman: do you know how many wives some of these Biblical heroes had?) 

But Jonah and Toby were perplexed. 

The boys know what gay and straight mean and they have friends with two moms or two dads.  (They also know friends who have single parents, divorced parents, and friends who live with grandparents.  They know adults who are single or with partners, same sex or opposite sex.  They know kids who have adoptive or foster parents.  They know there are MANY types of families.) 

We have raised Jonah and Toby to respect ALL people and to believe that each of us is exactly who we are supposed to be. 

Perhaps it comes down to the fact that the boys are closer to these fundamental human rules we teach children: Treat others as you would like to be treated.  Don't judge others.  Be kind.  Love one another. 

Maybe we all would do well to remember these things.

Both boys cheer when they see a "Vote No" sign or billboard.  Toby wishes with all his heart that kids would be allowed to vote on this issue.

Minnesota: Take note! Your future awaits:  In the next 9 years, Jonah and Toby will BOTH be registered voters. 

Middle-schoolers do NOT have play dates!

They "hang out."

Whatever it is called, this is what it looks like:

Screen to screen

And it is SO not the same as two kids playing on their own computers in separate homes. 

What ev.

Halloween!

This year Toby dressed as a ghoul- the "scream" mask with dark grim reaper clothes and a sickle.  He had LOTS of fun posing dramatically for pictures:

Jonah was a sorcerer.  He scoffed when I asked him if he needed a wand.  "Mom, that's so kiddish!"  Sorcerers, I was told, need swords, not wands!

The boys went trick-or-treating with their friends so we did not even see them for most of the evening!

Toby, Mason, Jaxson, and Jonah

On Zippers

Yesterday, Jonah and Toby sang in church with the RUCC Boys Choir.  As the service started, we stood to say one of the prayers, and I noticed Toby's zipper was down. 

I passed him a note:

He wrote back:

What to do?! 

A quick check of his shirt told me it wasn't long enough to completely cover the open zipper.  Toby would be in the front row so yes, it would be very obvious.

And sometimes these parts of the service are photographed and put out on Facebook for all the world to see!

How many people would notice if I tried to "unstick" the zipper right there in the pew?  Would it be more distracting for us to leave the sanctuary to fix the zipper?  

I quickly realized two things: 1) how noticable this will be depends on just how stuck it actually is - how graceful (or not) I can be, and 2) We are in CHURCH, and IF any of my church family notice, they will likely not think, "pedophile!":  I would probably have some kind of benefit of the doubt. 
(At what age, by the way, did my kids' clothing become NOT my responsibility - I changed diapers and dressed them for how many years?! At some point before now, however, it has become socially unacceptable for me to zipper or button their pants in public)

Luckily for me, it was an easy zipper "fix".  I don't think many people noticed.  But Toby's clasped hands probably would have covered the open zipper. . .

Running with the. . .

Jonah today reported that he and five other boys at school are in the same after-school activity on Wednesdays.  He said, "we all just hung together. In a pack. Kind of like WOLVES!"  What a funny image- I do think 6th grade boys have a lot in common with wolf packs actually.

Here are some related photos: we got a new (large) kennel for Pepper (thanks, Kevin!):

New Routines

We are a month into the new school year and have (mostly) adjusted our new routines.

Jonah and Toby are trying out new responsibilities: getting themselves out of the house and on their respective school buses in the morning instead of morning day care.

For the first time in 12 years, Ken is enjoying NOT having to get kids ready for school or drop them off at daycare!  He is thrilled about this newfound morning calm.  I am often on my way to work before the boys even wake up so sometimes I do not see them until evening.  :(

The boys walk Pepper and then Jonah walks Toby to the bus stop (on the corner just 3 houses away!).   

Jonah catches his bus at the other end of the block a half hour later. He has missed his bus ONLY once!  To Jonah's credit, he figured out what to do (he WAS listening when we discussed the backup plan!). 

I only occasionally get a phone call in the morning - a tearful Toby who "can't find any jeans that fit!" or Jonah, "Mom, where are my keys?!" 

Middle school has brought a new entity to our household- a sneering mouthy presence who sometimes lives inside Jonah.  We call him "Chuckles."   Chuckles' mode of operation is entitlement and scorn: "It's my life - you can't command me;" "I demand that you respect me;" while at the same time neglecting to submit homework, clear his dishes, keep track of his belongings.

The most interesting part is the surprised outrage that comes when he realizes his screen time has been revoked pending submission of missing assignments, etc.  (We're not really sure what part of the
responsibility = privileges equation is unclear. . .) 

None of these consequences are his fault of course, and if he had drawn better parents in this lottery, his life would be ever so much better!  We tell him this is giving him useful information for his own future children: he has the power to make their lives infinitely more enjoyable than we are making his.   Chuckles lies, yells, and scorns his lame family.   And then seemingly at random, Chuckles disappears and we get Jonah again.  



Calvin and Hobbes



We are learning all over again how to parent this child.  Just when we think we have it down, a new stage pops up.  I pray for patience and try to believe in the lessons taught by logical consequences.

After school programs begin this month and Jonah is excited about chess, engineering, and backstage crew for the fall play. 

Toby joined drama club at school this year and can hardly wait to begin Math Masters and chess club.  His competitive side is finding all sorts of outlets at school: How many minutes can he read in a month?  How quickly can he do 100 multiplication problems?    

Swim team is in full swing as well, which means we almost never have dinner before 8:00 pm, although we do usually get to eat dinner together as a family most nights!

View From the Handlebars

In May, I (Sheri) started experimenting with bike commuting.  It is 8 miles from home to work.  If I ride the entire way, it takes 40 minutes.  And I can coordinate bike and bus since all city busses have bike racks on the front, so many days, I bike from work to downtown (10 minutes) and catch a bus from there.

Most of my ride looks like this:

Although there is a 2.5 mile stretch where I ride on North 2nd Street, and play with the big trucks. . .

But it's not so bad -- notice the nice wide bike lane:

Initially, I started bussing to work and biking home.  My view of "I can't bike TO work because I would arrive all sweaty!" did not last long.  First, I realized I could change into my work clothes after I arrived and cooled down.  Secondly, it was brutally hot this summer and my only chance at riding in cooler temps was to ride at 7 am. 

At the beginnning of the summer, I felt very much like a "wanna-be:" out there being passed by the REAL bike commuters.  After logging 300+ miles on my bike this summer, I know the routes, where the trails connect with other trails (or streets), and how to load my bike on the bus!  I've turned into a REAL bike commuter - I think!

I LOVE not having to fight traffic, spending time outdoors, getting some exercise without having to plan time to exercise! 

I hope to continue to bike (at least between work and downtown) throughout fall and then take it up again in the spring.  One of my favorite routines this month has been biking/bussing to Loring School after work on the days that I pick Toby up and then walking him home after school.

Twelve!

Ah, Jonah, how did we get to your twelfth birthday already?!    How clearly I remember holding my newborn Jonah - you were light enough to lift with one arm and your head fit into my palm.  Now we are nearly head-to-head, and this will likely be the last year that I am taller than you!

Yesterday, you started middle school - a big transition! All of your emotions over the past week: excitement, nervousness, fear, uncertainty . . . these all coalesced yesterday afternoon when you got off the bus grinning, "It was a breeze, Mom!" 

You've become increasingly independent over this past year and you are so ready for middle school! 



You are still happiest when you're in motion. 

Whether it is running with the dog, flipping on the trampoline, biking, swimming, or tree-climbing: this motion completes you!  You fell in love with soccer this year: you've always enjoyed soccer but this year something clicked and you LOVED it!  You've found your niche on defense and while you're not a super-star, you are a solid and dependable player and you work hard on the field. 

I am so proud of the compassion you show others.  You happily work with other kids who might not be the easiest, or most sought-after.  I love this about you.  You are a steady and loyal friend and I've had glimpses this year into the importance of those solid relationships you've built with your close friends.  You've become confident in yourself: Ms. A. from Loring shared with me one of the qualities she admires in you: "Jonah is true to himself and he does not try to change or adapt to others' perceptions of him."  You will need this strength in the next few years. 

Much of this year was spent learning and re-learning responsibility and taking your work seriously.  You love to do things well; the flip side of this is that you don't want to try something if you're not sure you can do it well. Or spend time working on something that is hard or something which doesn't feel comfortable.  This is the down-side of perfectionism.  I know it well.  You and I are so alike in some ways.  My wish for you is that you will internalize solid work and study-habits now rather than learning this lesson the hard way.  I know that most lessons must be learned through experience, so this is an outside hope. . . 

Your sharp tongue is both a joy and frustration.  You are funny, sarcastic and love word play.  Unfortunately, this also means back-talk, word games, and getting the last word in during an argument!  But . . . You're not supposed to get the last word- I am!!!  (and therein lies the crux of most of the clashes between the two of us.)

You continue to enjoy music and your trombone and piano play a big role in your identity.  I'm glad you will continue band in middle school and I hope you continue to love it as you have.  The compliments you receive when you play publicly sustain you and I look forward to your concerts and solos.  Here is the video of one of your piano solos from this past Sunday when you played during the church service:

I love you, Jonah, and wish you a year filled with joy and harmony!

xoxo
Mom

Church Family Retreat

August 17 - 19, 2012


Sheri took a few pictures during our church's "Rest, Relax and Renew Retreat" at Pilgrim Point Camp (near Alexandria, MN).  Hope you enjoy the photos she took and the music!

Dog Days

We've had Pepper, our 6-month-old lab and hound mix, for nearly a month already!

She has learned "sit," "lie down," and the boys have taught her "shake":

"Shake, Pepper, shake!" 

Pepper loves to play! 

A dog and her boy

Puppy Love!

The cats have adjusted, although "tolerate" is the best word to describe their attitude toward Pepper.  Pepper cannot understand why she can't entice the cats to play with her!

Jazzy's stance just prior to "Hiss! Growl! Swat!"

Bella

The cats in their favorite daytime activity, lounging in the windowsills:

Jazzy

Toby turns nine!

Happy Ninth Birthday, Toby!



This past year has been a year of such growth for you!

Just one year ago today, you decided to stop sucking your thumb and you've never looked back: a testament to your will. 

You went from not being secure in the deep end of a pool to excelling in the butterfly in swim team! 



Toby at 18 months

 On our vacation this summer, you charged ahead with Jonah, climbing rocks and exploring trails.  You are finding your independence and it is wonderful to see that quality develop.  I love to see you venturing out of your comfort zone: riding your bike alone or with your brother, etc.

You still hesitate and work through big anxieties.  On our recent day at the beach, it took me awhile to realize that fear (fear of not being able to see the lake bottom? fear of the fish biting you?) was keeping you on shore.  I love that you let me lead you out into the water and that you trusted me enough to venture out to the diving platform with me swimming next to you.  You had such a blast after you conquered your fear and could not get enough of the jumping/diving/swimming after you tried it! 



I am so proud of you, always, for working through your anxiety, talking it through, reasoning with yourself, and I love seeing the confidence spring forth when you've overcome your hesitation. 



Toby in 2007 - 4 years old



Your fears are not always so simple to overcome.  You've heard too much about recent gun violence, and I can see how much it worries you.  It makes me sad to hear you ask why people are able to buy guns when they might do violence.  It breaks my heart when you ask if we've remembered to lock our doors at night and if it is likely that someone might shoot a gun in our neighborhood.  There are no easy answers for this one, although I suppose it is one more indication of your maturing brain: moving beyond a dualistic way of perceiving the world to the realization that not everything breaks down into "good" or "bad."

Your thinking is logical and thoughtful.  It is lovely to reason with you - your stubbornness finds a beautiful complement in your logical reasoning.  Your memory is amazing and you often surprise us by the details you recall about an event.  You still love to read non-fiction and you learn very well by reading: I suspect you are a contextual learner.  You eagerly share all that is in your head, whether it is the newest video game tidbit or something you read or learned at camp.  Your dialog is the soundtrack to our days and although some of it (Pokemon, for example) does not stick in my brain, I love to listen to you.

You readily accept the value in work first/ play later and are very motivated to get your "jobs" done in order to have free time. Similarly, you are willing to work hard to reach a goal.  You're proud of your progress in school, and you connect your effort with your performance: I admire your maturity in this area.  This summer you diligently worked on front flips on the trampoline: this is hard, since you've watched your brother effortlessly flipping on the trampoline for years, and it was frustrating for you to have to work so hard in order to inch incrementally closer to a full flip.  However, you perservered and now can perform a beautiful flip.

You're almost always calm and serene: and you draw others to you with your sunny disposition.  You have a wonderful group of friends and it has been fun for me to watch you make friends with new classmates and swim team-mates this last year.  You and Jonah continue to be best buds - you will both miss each other greatly being in separate schools this year!

You are sweet and loving and you still love to cuddle.  You are very gentle with the cats and Jazzy allows you to carry her around like a baby, an honor she does not tolerate well from anyone else!  You love Pepper as well, and you've been great at remembering the details of her care and training! 

Toby in his favorite orange shirt,
skinny jeans, and nikes!

Perhaps most surprising to me over the past year has been your developing fashion sense.  You still LOVE to wear orange and other bright colors.  You developed a preference for skinny jeans and during the school year, you refuse to wear anything other than jeans.  Your love of shoes thrills (and scares) me: this spring you just had to upgrade to some cool black and neon-green Nikes.  You have distinct musical likes (along with a few dislikes) and one of your great joys is listening to your ipod.

Fourth grade will bring many new opportunities and I look forward to seeing what this next year holds in store for you.

But for today, enjoy your special summer day!  Whenever you need me to be there, I will always swim right beside you through the deep waters: I will be the one cheering you on!

Have a very Happy Birthday, Toby!

xoxo.
Mom

Grand Teton and Badlands National Parks

Thursday, July 5th, 2012

We were all so excited to see so much wildlife in Yellowstone.  Seeing the wolf was awe inspiring!

We packed up and made our way to Grand Teton National Park!



We rented a "camping cabin" at Colter Bay.  Two walls were log cabin-style walls, and two were canvas tent-style walls.  We spent two nights in this cabin.  It had a wood burning stove - and we needed it!

We did some wildlife watching, took a ferry across Jenny Lake and hiked to Hidden Falls, swam, and set a goal for ourselves:  we wanted to see a moose!

Watch the video to see if we met our goal!

 

________________________________________

On Saturday, July 7th, we drove across Wyoming, bound for Badlands National Park in South Dakota.



We arrived late and did some hiking the next morning (July 8th) before we drove back to Minneapolis.  The South Dakota Badlands seemed more rugged than the North Dakota badlands.  SD had fewer trees and vegetation in the valleys.

The boys have always enjoyed climbing in the Badlands.  I took several shots of them climbing and enjoying the scenery.

We managed to see my brother, Keith, and his family in Sioux Falls as they returned from seeing my other brother, Duane, in Atlanta, GA.


We made it home by 10:00 that night.  We were exhausted and glad to be home!  It was a long vacation!

____________________

4 people.
4 states.
4 national parks.

Click here to see photos from Theodore Roosevelt National Park (ND Badlands).

Click here to see photos from Yellowstone National Park.

Here's a map of our 10-day, 2,800 mile vacation!