Jumpin' Monkeys

This story describes how I got totally spanked by a 5-year-old at a game called "Jumpin' Monkeys."

The object of the game is to catapult your four plastic monkeys onto a plastic tree. The monkeys have to be hanging from their hands, not lying flat on top of the tree. You win the round if you're the first to get your moneys to land in the tree hanging from their hands. The winner of the round gets all of the bananas in the banana pile. In the end, the person with the most bananas in his or her banana pile wins the game.

So I'm playing this game with a 5-year old, right? I'm taking it easy, trying not to win too quickly and damage his fragile, developing ego. Well, in very little time, this 5-year old (Toby's classmate and our friend) has successfully landed three of his monkeys in the tree and I've only got 1. I apply some strategy -- I've decided to aim for his monkeys. That's right, folks, I was gotta knock out his monkeys to save my neck. I'm not sure what happened to my "don't damage his fragile developing ego" bit from the beginning of the game but those thoughts were long gone - like a plastic monkey launched from a plastic catapult. I'm takin' out his monkeys!

I missed. His turn. I watched him catapult his last monkey into the tree. I could feel my own ego getting smashed up like a mushy banana as it landed perfectly in the tree. His four monkeys were hanging there, mocking me. Smiling at me with those eyes. I'm sure they were laughing at me. He won. He shouted gleefully, arms raised in victory. The bananas in the banana pile were his.

My ego was quickly repaired, however, since I won the next round.

We never got to finish the game. By the time we were ready for round three, more kids had come upstairs, drawn zombie-like to the victorious laughter of a happy 5-year old catapulting plastic monkeys in the living room. These kids wanted to play too.

The game quickly deteriorated as Jonah discovered that the ceiling fan was within range of his plastic monkeys. They also discovered that they could hit their own heads with their own plastic monkeys. They discovered that each others' heads were within range. Toby discovered that it was way more fun to catapult your monkey OVER the tree and into the lap of the friend sitting opposite you than it was to get it to hang in the tree.

Monkeys were flyin' everywhere. Kids were shrieking with laughter.

I discovered the joy of hosting our baby-siting co-op.