New Routines

We are a month into the new school year and have (mostly) adjusted our new routines.

Jonah and Toby are trying out new responsibilities: getting themselves out of the house and on their respective school buses in the morning instead of morning day care.

For the first time in 12 years, Ken is enjoying NOT having to get kids ready for school or drop them off at daycare!  He is thrilled about this newfound morning calm.  I am often on my way to work before the boys even wake up so sometimes I do not see them until evening.  :(

The boys walk Pepper and then Jonah walks Toby to the bus stop (on the corner just 3 houses away!).   

Jonah catches his bus at the other end of the block a half hour later. He has missed his bus ONLY once!  To Jonah's credit, he figured out what to do (he WAS listening when we discussed the backup plan!). 

I only occasionally get a phone call in the morning - a tearful Toby who "can't find any jeans that fit!" or Jonah, "Mom, where are my keys?!" 

Middle school has brought a new entity to our household- a sneering mouthy presence who sometimes lives inside Jonah.  We call him "Chuckles."   Chuckles' mode of operation is entitlement and scorn: "It's my life - you can't command me;" "I demand that you respect me;" while at the same time neglecting to submit homework, clear his dishes, keep track of his belongings.

The most interesting part is the surprised outrage that comes when he realizes his screen time has been revoked pending submission of missing assignments, etc.  (We're not really sure what part of the
responsibility = privileges equation is unclear. . .) 

None of these consequences are his fault of course, and if he had drawn better parents in this lottery, his life would be ever so much better!  We tell him this is giving him useful information for his own future children: he has the power to make their lives infinitely more enjoyable than we are making his.   Chuckles lies, yells, and scorns his lame family.   And then seemingly at random, Chuckles disappears and we get Jonah again.  



Calvin and Hobbes



We are learning all over again how to parent this child.  Just when we think we have it down, a new stage pops up.  I pray for patience and try to believe in the lessons taught by logical consequences.

After school programs begin this month and Jonah is excited about chess, engineering, and backstage crew for the fall play. 

Toby joined drama club at school this year and can hardly wait to begin Math Masters and chess club.  His competitive side is finding all sorts of outlets at school: How many minutes can he read in a month?  How quickly can he do 100 multiplication problems?    

Swim team is in full swing as well, which means we almost never have dinner before 8:00 pm, although we do usually get to eat dinner together as a family most nights!

View From the Handlebars

In May, I (Sheri) started experimenting with bike commuting.  It is 8 miles from home to work.  If I ride the entire way, it takes 40 minutes.  And I can coordinate bike and bus since all city busses have bike racks on the front, so many days, I bike from work to downtown (10 minutes) and catch a bus from there.

Most of my ride looks like this:

Although there is a 2.5 mile stretch where I ride on North 2nd Street, and play with the big trucks. . .

But it's not so bad -- notice the nice wide bike lane:

Initially, I started bussing to work and biking home.  My view of "I can't bike TO work because I would arrive all sweaty!" did not last long.  First, I realized I could change into my work clothes after I arrived and cooled down.  Secondly, it was brutally hot this summer and my only chance at riding in cooler temps was to ride at 7 am. 

At the beginnning of the summer, I felt very much like a "wanna-be:" out there being passed by the REAL bike commuters.  After logging 300+ miles on my bike this summer, I know the routes, where the trails connect with other trails (or streets), and how to load my bike on the bus!  I've turned into a REAL bike commuter - I think!

I LOVE not having to fight traffic, spending time outdoors, getting some exercise without having to plan time to exercise! 

I hope to continue to bike (at least between work and downtown) throughout fall and then take it up again in the spring.  One of my favorite routines this month has been biking/bussing to Loring School after work on the days that I pick Toby up and then walking him home after school.

Twelve!

Ah, Jonah, how did we get to your twelfth birthday already?!    How clearly I remember holding my newborn Jonah - you were light enough to lift with one arm and your head fit into my palm.  Now we are nearly head-to-head, and this will likely be the last year that I am taller than you!

Yesterday, you started middle school - a big transition! All of your emotions over the past week: excitement, nervousness, fear, uncertainty . . . these all coalesced yesterday afternoon when you got off the bus grinning, "It was a breeze, Mom!" 

You've become increasingly independent over this past year and you are so ready for middle school! 



You are still happiest when you're in motion. 

Whether it is running with the dog, flipping on the trampoline, biking, swimming, or tree-climbing: this motion completes you!  You fell in love with soccer this year: you've always enjoyed soccer but this year something clicked and you LOVED it!  You've found your niche on defense and while you're not a super-star, you are a solid and dependable player and you work hard on the field. 

I am so proud of the compassion you show others.  You happily work with other kids who might not be the easiest, or most sought-after.  I love this about you.  You are a steady and loyal friend and I've had glimpses this year into the importance of those solid relationships you've built with your close friends.  You've become confident in yourself: Ms. A. from Loring shared with me one of the qualities she admires in you: "Jonah is true to himself and he does not try to change or adapt to others' perceptions of him."  You will need this strength in the next few years. 

Much of this year was spent learning and re-learning responsibility and taking your work seriously.  You love to do things well; the flip side of this is that you don't want to try something if you're not sure you can do it well. Or spend time working on something that is hard or something which doesn't feel comfortable.  This is the down-side of perfectionism.  I know it well.  You and I are so alike in some ways.  My wish for you is that you will internalize solid work and study-habits now rather than learning this lesson the hard way.  I know that most lessons must be learned through experience, so this is an outside hope. . . 

Your sharp tongue is both a joy and frustration.  You are funny, sarcastic and love word play.  Unfortunately, this also means back-talk, word games, and getting the last word in during an argument!  But . . . You're not supposed to get the last word- I am!!!  (and therein lies the crux of most of the clashes between the two of us.)

You continue to enjoy music and your trombone and piano play a big role in your identity.  I'm glad you will continue band in middle school and I hope you continue to love it as you have.  The compliments you receive when you play publicly sustain you and I look forward to your concerts and solos.  Here is the video of one of your piano solos from this past Sunday when you played during the church service:

I love you, Jonah, and wish you a year filled with joy and harmony!

xoxo
Mom